The Stay-At-Home-Dad in our country

can you be a stay at home dad- Parenting resources by ZenParent

This is the age of the metrosexual man and paternity leave is actually a topic of discussion in many organizations. Times are changing and stereotypes are being shattered every day. So, as an expectant dad or a new dad with a spouse who is qualified enough to bring home the bread, have you ever considered if you could be happy being a STAY AT HOME DAD?

1. It’s not common: First, you have to be someone who does not care about what other people think and you march to your own beat. While being confident in your own masculinity, be prepared to fundamentally disbelieve in societal stereotypes in India especially. Everybody from your mother in law to the security at the gate would question your choice and you have to be super sure that YOU do not consider yourself any less than your wife for making this choice.

2. Household Chores: If you have never rolled up your sleeves to help around the house, you are about to learn it from the inside out! Everything from managing the maid, the milkman, the vegetable vendor , the cook (if you have one), to making sure the baby supplies are refilled constantly are all on you. Once you quit your job, your spouse will also have very different expectations from you 🙂  No longer can you get away throwing your wet towel on the floor, or leave your half read newspaper in the bathroom.

3. Social Life : Stay at home moms form cliques and do pot luck parties and chai get-togethers to catch on some personal time- off from parenting! As a SAHD, you would most probably not have those options – 99% , if not 100% of your friends would be full time /overtime working men, just like you used to be, who will not have any time during the day. This is not insurmountable- you need to probably find a club where you can go and take a break in the evenings for creating a social life, which fell naturally in place while you were working.

stay at home dad- Parenting resources by ZenParent

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4. It’s Mentally Exhausting : When you are at work , among adults, you are challenged to solve problems, manage people, use your logical and thinking skills etc. When you are a SAHD, nothing much changes day to day. The tasks and duties pretty much remain the same and it can get a little mind numbing. Adult interaction is a huge part of working a corporate job and having that element removed can be more than a little depressing.

5. What “type” are you? : Some people love kids and some people can deal with children in only small doses. Children have the ability to drive you crazy on multiple occasions. So if you inherently have a short temper and tend to prefer your routines and habits, then being a SAHD is definitely not for you. ‘Unpredictably crazy’ is the name of the game when it comes to parenting little kids.

If you have been brave enough who decided that that you are ready to be at home with the child and quit your job while your spouse pursues her career, we would love to hear your thoughts on your experience on being a “House husband” 🙂

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