I’m a Mom and I just did a vacation without the Kids!

Don't feel guilty taking that solo vacation! ZenParent

I just returned from an adventure experience that I went on my own. Two weeks in the Himalayas, with a group of friends. I have two kids and of course there is always a question nagging behind every mom’s brain as to “Is it necessary” to take a vacation without your kids? Would they be ok? Will they miss mommy too much?  Will anybody else be able to take care of them they way I do? These were the questions on my mind before I started taking these trips a couple of years ago. Having had the luxury to be a stay-at-home mom while my kids were being raised, they were literally my 3rd arm when they were babies. But now that they are a little grown up, I take trips on my own without them every once in a while and here is why, out of experience, I believe that every mom should do the same, if her support structure permits it.

1. Absence makes the heart grow fonder: As clichéd as it is, absence DOES make the heart grow fonder. At the risk of being politically incorrect,  “momming”  can be a  grind sometimes- constant monitoring of food, clothing , homework, do’s , don’ts, teach them math, read with them, teach them manners etc.  And sometimes both parties get on each other’s nerves- a break can do good to take a step back and miss the warmth and love of the relationship.

2. A break from thinking about what to cook/feed! Sometimes, it just feels good to stop thinking about another person’s gastrointestinal tract. Those of us who travel with picky eaters know what a pain it can be to find something that our child will be willing to eat. Oh, here is a beautiful restaurant set on a hillock, no wait, they serve only Aloo Paratta which my child will not touch with a barge pole. OK, let’s find that terrible pizza chain place!

3. Take a breath and take stock : Parenting is a series of decisions we make on a continuous basis. It is also hard to make the right decisions when you are right in the middle of the vortex. Sometimes you need to step away from a situation to reflect on what is going right and what can be made better. If you have a teenager you are having issues with, both of you taking a break can give you time to think about how you can get the relationship to work better. If you have younger children, the break allows you to take a breath(or several) so that you can dive back in with your sanity whole again.

4. Makes your kids independent : As much as moms would like to believe that their kids would be lost without them, kids are resilient and do remarkably well on their own. They learn to communicate what they need, they get to understand that what they want is not top priority for everybody in the world, they understand that good manners like being polite gets them better results and that they cannot always run to mommy to sort out their problems.

5. Set an Example : Life is about taking responsibility and parenting IS an important responsibility. However, it is good for your children to also see that parents are individuals who need to do stuff on their own. It is healthy to pursue your aspirations, your dreams and your children are part of your life , but they don’t have to do everything with you.

Some places are just not interesting for kids and rather than dragging them moaning and groaning, take a break, do your thing, and don’t feel guilty that your kids are not with you. Yes, as a mom , when you are on that break and you try a new dessert , you will think about your daughter who would probably enjoy it every much, or that your son would love to go on that thrill ride. But every mom, needs that little break to step away from being mom to be a woman, a wanderer, an adventurer, a shopaholic.. and come back to step into those ‘mom shoes’ with renewed vigour, passion and energy!

Tell us if you’ve ever done solo holidays and what it did for you!

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