5 ways to Parent an Introvert Child

All parents desire for their kids to be outgoing, extroverted and gregarious. However, some of our kids ARE introvert and shy, just the way some of us adults are!  Research says almost 30% of kids are introvert and that the brain of an introvert person is simply wired differently than an extroverted person. Now, how many of us knew this?

The difference between a shy kid and an introvert kid is that, a shy kid wants the company of others, but lacks the confidence to approach them. That kid can be coached to be more confident and assertive.  An introvert kid, on the other hand, likes being on his own and does not crave the company of others. He, in fact, feels a little overwhelmed with too much interaction and would like to withdraw beyond a point of his own tolerance. So as a parent, we need to observe our child closely enough to know if they are truly introvert or just shy. But if you see that your child is indeed an introvert, here are a few things you can do to parent them better:

it's alright to be an introvert- Parenting resources by ZenParent

1. Stand up for your child: We have a tendency in us, to be “almost” ashamed of our introvert child. Don’t be. Introverts operate differently and have their own strengths which extroverts can only aspire for. So if people are labelling your child negatively, stand up for your kids. If we don’t, then we are giving out a wrong message to our child, who is more important than the outside world- that we are ashamed of him, which is a great blow to a child’s self esteem.

2. Give them time: Introverts do not like to be rushed. They take it slow and steady, but finally tend to excel at the things they care for. This is because they draw energy from within them and are not so dependent on external stimuli. In fact, they are not even shy and just want to work at their own pace.  This is a wonderful trait about introverts.

introvert kids can focus for long- Parenting resources by ZenParent

3. Be Appreciative: While we might be flustered that our child is introvert, they have many gifts, which extroverts sometimes lack. For example, it is proven that they can concentrate for long periods and remain focused. They can be very creative and imaginative.  They make deep connections and establish lifelong relationships. They just need a little more time. But once they do, they stay loyal to the few friends that they have a good relationship with and are comfortable with, because they are committed to their sensitive and caring sides.

4. Stop Pushing: As we grow older, we slowly understand some philosophies of life like being happy with yourself and not seeking outside validation as much. The introvert child is happy with himself. So, let them be. Don’t constantly push them to be with others, play with others or follow the race. It is not the only way to live or be happy.

it's is alright to have an introvert kid- Parenting resources by ZenParent

5. Nurture their interests: Figure out what interests your child and nurture that interest. This is especially great for the introvert child because of their power of focus. If you can find out what their passion is, they have the ability to completely throw themselves into it and excel at it. The introvert child may not be interested in team sports or activities where there is too much noise and confusion. Let them pick what they are comfortable with, and take that up seriously.

If your child has reasonable social skills; If they can ask for help when they need; If they have a couple of friends whom they are comfortable playing with; If they are socially amiable, doing reasonably well at school (Not getting any complaints from the teacher); and if they are cheerful and happy… we need to let them be the way they are. Introvert kids will be better at resisting peer pressure – great boon in adolescence! They tend to think and plan and are not impulsive in their behavior.  I am not saying extroverts are not as focused as them. It’s just that we need to accept introverts for their basic nature and appreciate their strengths. Enjoy the deep connection that your introvert child makes with you, because life for your kid is not just about staying in the limelight or being popular. 🙂

Image source: via Google images

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