5 things no mom should ever have to justify to anyone

 "Hey, since you're at home all day after dropping Ritwik to school, can I drop Rohan off at your place for a couple of hours?"

"Uhhhm, sorry, I don't have the time to keep an eye on him."
"Just a couple of hours. I have a party that I have to attend."
"I've got too many chores to run. I won't even be at home."
"Oh, really? Fine, that's okay then. I just thought I'd ask you because you're at home all day long."

*slap*

By Melissa L Fenton

 

1. Why “No” is a complete sentence

When asked to do something that I didn’t have the time, energy, or any desire whatsoever to do, I used to feel like I had to justify my “no” answer with a detailed reason why I couldn’t do what was being asked. Guess what? People don’t care, and you don’t need to explain shit. Say “no,” and move on.

2. Your kid’s participation in extracurricular activities (or lack thereof)

That’s just it, they are your kid’s activities. When, where, and how many your family decides to participate in is nobody else’s business. Getting heat from other moms for not signing up for next season, joining the school band, or the after-school environmental club? Let it go, and continue to do what extracurricular activities are right for your family, not anyone else’s.

3. Why you’re not volunteering at school (or Girl Scouts, youth group, or T-ball)

I spent years volunteering at my kids’ school — for everything from classroom subbing to PTA committee work to being the chairperson for large events — and now I’m just plain tired. My kids are also not so little anymore, and I am entering a different season of life dealing with teens and college-aged kids. For this reason, I am doing far less than I ever have at their school. But you (and I) don’t need a reason or explanation for why we are getting off the school-volunteerism roller coaster. Say “no” confidently and without a sentence after it, because you decide what you do, when you do it, and if it is worthy of your time or leaves you resentful and drained.

4. Why you’re taking time off from social media, moms’ night out, and other social gatherings

So, you need to just be in your own head for a little while, you’ve had enough of the comparison game played on Facebook, and you’re just too plain tired for a girls’ night out. Guess what? You are an adult. You get to say who, when, and where you get to spend your free social time. Finding yourself a little more introverted lately? You’re not alone, and you don’t need to explain your reasons to the extroverted.

5. Why your mental health is your priority

When you finally realize that you’re able to do all of the above without explanation, the first thing to thank you will be your mental health, and making it a priority trumps everything. And I do mean everything. Taking a step back from life, taking medication, seeing a therapist, or any other form of recharging your brain batteries by checking out of life for a while never needs an explanation from you to your peers. When you need a break, you need a break, not an inquisition. Period.

Putting yourself, your health, and your family ahead of your concern for how others will react to you having to do or be less should be your number one priority. Leave all the mom explaining up to others who still actually have some fucks to give.

 

SOURCE: scarymommy.com

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