Easy Tips


Raise Happy Kids by Letting them be Sad

sadness is also required- Parenting resources by ZenParent

No one can remain happy all the time. It’s perfectly okay to have a few bad days. Let’s face it- it’s alright!

Anger, sadness and other “negative” emotions are vital parts of human experience. The more comfortable the kids are with these negative emotions, the better they will be able to feel emotions like love, laughter, contentment and joy. We know it’s easier said than done, because it’s absolutely nerve wrecking to see the kid hurt but here are few reasons to let them be sad once in a blue moon.

1. Teach them to accept those feelings

Cope up with these negative emotions by accepting them. Tell your tiny-tots that the bad behavior accompanying negative thoughts is not acceptable, but send a message that those feelings are okay, even the worst ones. Remember, terrible feelings of fear, greed and jealousy are often invitations to grow and achieve something better.

Note: teach them ways to deal with “downbeat thoughts” in a constructive manner.

2. Let them deal with their own life’s bumps

sad or happy both are necessary for kids- Parenting resources by ZenParent

To pursue happiness and contentment, the children need to adapt to their own ways to deal with their tiny life bumps. Not allowing them to be sad robs them of that opportunity. Being unhappy gives them the space to feel and sail through tough paths. It helps them face such challenges, to help them be victorious and confident on the other end. So, just let them stay alone and figure out how to get rid of an issue that’s upsetting them.

3. Unhappiness as a motivational tool

Teach them that screaming and violence, throwing things and name-calling are not the ways to deal with life’s challenges. But, instead encourage them to channelize it more effectively. For example, encourage them to participate in a nearby skating or karate class to help them learn some discipline as well as vent out their anger in a controlled atmosphere. As an added bonus, they will acquire a skill or two too.

4. Help them deal with the someone said “no-to-me” tantrum:

Remember, the world is going to say “NO” to your kids in more ways than they’d expect. So make them get used to hearing ‘no’ when they’re at home with the people they love. Though, it might make them unhappy at first but then, they’ll learn to deal with it.

5. Let them learn by trial and error:

sadness is also necessary for kids to learn- Parenting resources by ZenParent

Studies reveal that lessons learnt through trial and error are seldom forgotten. Although, at times you may know that they aren’t doing it right and will fall down, it’s totally okay to learn after sustaining a few bruises. Trust us, they won’t repeat it anytime soon or ever, so allow them to experiment and explore.

Note: you might them advice them of the consequences of their actions, but allow them to take a plunge (if it’s not life threatening). This way they will learn better.

No matter what, make your kids feel wanted and loved at all times. Support them at each step of their lives and help them deal with their fair share of sadness.  Don’t worry! This will only make them emerge out as happier, more confident and stronger individuals who can face the challenges that life throws at them.

Children have a sound emotional intelligence and you can boost it to help them handle the negative emotions easily. Here’s how.

Published On  August 4, 2015 By